9 Tips for Cultivating Resilience

Resilience helps us face life’s many challenging moments and situations. The term may seem synonymous with toughness or grit, but being resilient isn't necessarily about muscling your way past obstacles.

"It’s not about pushing through at all costs or pretending things don’t hurt," says Supatra Tovar, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist in Pasadena, California, who specializes in helping people manage anxiety, chronic stress, depression, eating disorders, and trauma. "True resilience is the capacity to bend without breaking — to experience stress, grief, conflict, or uncertainty and remain connected to yourself, your values, and your sense of agency."

Here, experts share some tips on how to improve your resilience.

Remember that consistency matters when it comes to building resilience. "Small, repeated stress-relieving practices create a buffer that allows us to weather storms without collapsing under their weight," Tovar says.

1. Eat Well

Your mind and body are intricately connected, says David Palmiter, PhD, a Bethesda, Maryland–based clinical psychologist and the author of two books on promoting resilience in youth. Dr. Palmiter says that, generally, what's good for your physical health also tends to benefit your mental health, but the "health tripod” of nutrition, physical activity, and sleep is especially crucial.

Tovar reports that she often observes improvements in clients’ physical energy, emotional stability, and mental clarity when they adopt healthier, more balanced eating habits. "People tell me things like, 'I don’t spiral as fast anymore,' or 'I feel like I can handle my day without snapping,’” she says.

2. Make Time for Movement

3. Get Plenty of High-Quality Sleep

And when you don’t sleep well, you may simply be too tired to engage in stress-management strategies like exercise or socializing.

4. Treat Challenges as Growth Opportunities

A shift in your mindset can boost resilience during difficult times. For example, you could try reframing hurdles as opportunities for learning and self-discovery.

"For a resilient person, adversity makes them stronger, wiser, and better when they're on the other side of it," he says.

5. Practice Self-Compassion

Harsh self-criticism weakens resilience because it keeps us "stuck" in a state of depletion, Tovar notes. "Compassion strengthens it by allowing for recovery instead of shame,” she says.

6. Set Boundaries

Think of a rubber band: When it's stretched too far and for too long, it becomes harder for the band to snap back to its original shape. Similarly, over-giving, people-pleasing, and chronic over-responsibility can quickly drain resilience, Tovar says.

7. Use Stress-Management Strategies

Again, consistency is essential, Tovar says. So find a cadence that works for you (like every morning, every night before bed, or during your work commute), and stick with it.

8. Build and Nurture Connections

Being resilient doesn’t mean facing your challenges alone — it’s important to have others you can lean on for support.

Connecting with others at the community level can also help, for example, by volunteering, attending religious services, or joining a hiking group. "Feeling connected to something larger than yourself can be deeply stabilizing, especially when personal stress feels overwhelming," Tovar says.

9. Practice Gratitude

The Takeaway

• Anyone can build resilience, and doing so may improve your health and well-being.
• Resilience isn't about being tough or unaffected by stress. Rather, it's about boosting the brain and body's ability to adapt, recover, and learn from challenges.
• Strategies that may help cultivate resilience include prioritizing self-care and self-compassion, nourishing relationships, and practicing gratitude.